Control

I was ready and waiting at my computer at exactly 8:00 to book a careers appointment as soon as it went live, when some rapscallion stole it from straight under my nose while I was uploading some documents. I was in crisis, with the viability of my two-film cinema trip in ruins, and my mind spiralling off into several different parallel universes of time management. After some meditative exercise, the engineering thought processes were flowing, and I found a way. I love spontaneity, but only when I’m in full control.
The change in plans meant I could enjoy the sunshine before shutting myself inside a darkened box. Lay on the grass in Botanical Gardens, becoming one with the sea of grass, and flies. The arrival of noisy children heralded the time to leave. After my midday careers meeting, I went to the cinema. First, Atomic Blonde, an extremely stylish reunion for the female cast of Fast and Furious 8. Then I saw A Ghost Story, almost a product of a child’s perspective on death and memories. I think I was the only one in the audience who appreciated it though, “That was sh*t,” being declared from the back row as soon as the credits started rolling, with much confused conversation in the toilets afterwards.

August 6th (city of a thousand planets)

Several activities managed to coalesce into one, coherent whole today, beginning with the delightful task of cleaning the Playtime Centre at church. This then allowed me to stay for the start of the service and worship, before ditching everyone for the boring part, and powering back up the hill for lunch with Gethin, Grace and her mum. I enjoy our conversations of tearing all beliefs and established modes of behaviour to shreds.

Then went to Cineworld to watch Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets with Luke. Totally absorbing, and with a surprisingly unconventional storyline. It was also quite stylistically similar to animes, being based on a graphic novel. I was planning on watching another film afterwards, but it wasn’t screening anymore, which threw my trajectory off course. I was probably better off with a break anyway.

Submitted to the overruling desire for sugar, and bought some cookies on the way back home. Was reflecting afterwards how my fixation on perfection alters how I view criticism, because it makes me feel I could have done better, even when the problem is abstractly, or not even, related to my performance.

July 31st (my hero)

After breakfast, I sat in Weston Park for a while, listening to the wind in the trees. I was thinking how people, even those who know God, are often afraid of spending time with him because of what he might say, or how it might feel. But I often find Holyspirit just wants to be with us, in a regular, unspiritual way. Then I set off to the cinema for double-film glory.

First I watched The Big Sick, a rom com that was subtly hilarious, but then heart wrenching. Afterwards, a forgotten hero of my childhood reappeared in a blaze of glory: Captain Underpants. One of the best superhero origin stories in years. After the films, I found I’d induced a headache due to overconsumption of leftover peanuts.

Then had tea at Jayne and Rob’s. Upon returning home, helped Gethin with a slightly dubious closure ritual, which involved pouring two pints of beer down the outside drain; and so it returned to the ground from whence it came.

July 19th (Caesar)

Had a cinema day as the second instalment of enforced rest days. Watched War for the Planet of the Apes. Woody Harrelson delivered the best monologue I’ve heard in a long time. Caesar’s character was very similar to Moses, demanding for his people to be free, and also losing and regaining their respect. After a hasty lunch featuring lovely seeded bread, I then watched The Beguiled. Both films had very little dialogue, but worked really well. My tendency to not research the storylines of what I watch always backfires when a film unexpectedly develops into a thriller, but it makes it more of an experience.

Afterwards went to town briefly to pick up a wifi signal booster from Maplin and some snazzy sandals from TK Maxx. I heard Holyspirit telling me to get the sandals first, but I didn’t understand why, so ignored the feeling. Ended up waiting for a bus for ages though, without finding any of my purchases. Then went to the Williams’ for tea. Lowlights included finding out Death in Paradise is the least entertaining programme I’ve watched in years, but this was compensated by the opportunities to hurl verbal abuse at Joel from the car as he cycled home, admirably attempting to keep up.

July 16th (purpose)

Worked at The Cabin today, and after a manic first two hours, the busyness dropped off later on, with me simultaneously losing all my purpose. Although I found out my love of Kate Bush has been imparted upon one of my colleagues. Went to Sainsbury’s on my break to provide some activity. Now the house is empty apart from Gethin and I, the purge must start, the main fuels of which being bleach and elbow grease.

Whenever I get home from work, I find I’m most productive even though I’m tired, if I can just keep moving. My Cineworld card has been upgraded after a year, and is now stylishly black to indicate that I’ve ascended to the upper echelons of theatrics. Inducted Gethin into the creed of Naruto. I’ve watched the first episode so many times now, I’m confusing it with my own childhood. 

Finally got round to listen to some random worship songs in an attempt to connect with the Jesus. Although I think at the moment my single-minded approach is actually getting in the way. But I don’t know what to replace it with!

July 11th (baby)

Had my first day of doing nothing for ages. After breakfast and stuff, I lay on my bed for an hour just because I could. Then listened to the Pirates of the Caribbean theme, followed by Troy Sivan’s Blue Neighbourhood. Heard God say that I can start listening to music like I used to, purely enjoying the sounds, instead of to induce a spiritual experience.

Then went around town for a bit with Sam. Had a haircut following his advice, which may not have been a wise move, coming from a bald man. Went in the search of great suits, which were not, as I predicted, to be found in Topman. Developed a temporary, thirty-minute obsession with finding athletic running shorts, which didn’t yield any results.

Watched Baby Driver in the cinema. It was extremely entertaining, somehow transitioning between lightheartedness and intensity seamlessly. After a two hour wait and accidental nap in Starbucks, the gang assembled for Spider-Man: Homecoming, which was hilarious, and had a ridiculous number of story points. After such an energy-intensive day, cheese, crackers and bread were scoffed back at home. Looking forward to some crazy dreams.

June 2nd (in search of peanuts)

Started the day off by cleaning the kitchen while listening to Michael Jackson’s Bad; about damn time. That album always surprises me with how much I enjoy it. Then went to Sainsbury’s to search for the final, missing ingredient for tea, peanuts. Finding them overpriced, I was forced to brace the perils of catastrophic interior design of Coop. My wallet better thank me. 

Went to the cinema to watch Pirates of the Caribbean, then Wonder Woman. Pirates was much better than I thought it would be, from my impression of the trailer. I’ve probably become more critical than I was ten years ago, but it was still enjoyable. Wonder Woman was amazing, and I appreciated the anime-style movements and shots in the fight scenes. Again, I cannot understand why this film was much better received than all the previous films in the DC universe, which I love, and maybe even prefer.